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June 06, 2004Zeno, philosopher princess...
It's good to have my computer back. After my half a week of not being able to log onto the internet without having my computer reboot itself, I only enjoyed a few days with a fully-functioning machine before the whole damn thing decided to die on me.
One week and $400 later, everything is running as it should. The folks at Best Buy were able to salvage my documents and scripts and transfer them onto my new hard-drive. It's a whopping 80 gigs, which means the next time my machine crashes, the potential will be there to lose twice as much stuff. I can hardly wait. Actually, the 80-gig hard-drive came with $50 of mail-in rebates, rendering it less expensive than replacing my 40-gig drive with another of its ilk.
Being without a computer for a week was a harrowing experience. I have a 20-page essay due in my independent study class and a major revamp due for my playwriting class--both of which are due by the end of the week. They were originally due last week, but both of my professors took pity upon me and granted me extensions. A good thing, too.
However, before I can start on my essay, I need to finish grading essays for another class. I'm thankful for the opportunity, as always, but I think the school year's cumulative ennui has caught up with me. Somehow, my essay grading has morphed into one of Zeno's paradoxes.
Let's say I have 60 essays, and I grade half of them. Cool--30 essays down. Okay. Now let's say that I grade half of what's left, or 15 essays. Hey, I'm almost done! Forty-five out of 60 essays graded, right? I'm on easy street!
That's what Zeno wants you to think. Tricky 2,500-year-old bastard.
Now I grade half of the 15 remaining essays; I'm left with 7.5 ungraded essays.
I grade half of those, and I'm left with 3.75 essays.
Half of 3.75? A mere 1.875.
Halve that, and you're looking at 0.9375 essays left to grade. Less than one whole essay between me and freedom.
But if I keep only getting half of it done, and then half of the half, and then half of that half, I'll never finish.
That's pretty much how I feel right now. I have a mere seven essays left to grade, but I seem to get slower and slower with each one. I'm hoping to knock them out tonight, but I'm suffering from a decided lack of gumption.
Posted by patrick at June 6, 2004 11:48 PM
CommentsHeh heh. So you've hit on the ol' infinite regression. Larry Niven once wrote a short story on this topic, but you've also whammed up against a nice logical fallacy of Zeno's. Once you've hit .93 essays left to go, you've only got one left, and it's either done or not done. Ergo, your essay grading really isn't an infinite regression. It has a limit.
It's kind of like that statistically perfect family with 2.5 children. Unless everboy cranks out a Johnny Eck after their second child, the numbers don't hold in reality.
Hey, there's a reason that spreadsheet programs have an INT() function, y'know...?
Besides, you've got to finish up them essays so you can comment on my latest short story...
Posted by: Jon Bastian at June 7, 2004 01:50 AM
Ah, Zeno...a madman or just a pissant? Only the Bruces know for certain. As for me, I was trying to work Zeno's theorem into a rationalization behind my favorite missive, "I write things down so I don't *have* to remember them." So far, no luck making the two threads meet.
Posted by: Mad Monarch Voards at June 7, 2004 01:08 PM
Thank you! Chinese Apes.
Posted by: Yellow Monkey at February 25, 2005 09:49 AM
Thank you! Chinese Apes.
Posted by: Yellow Monkey at February 25, 2005 09:50 AM
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