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November 27, 2003

Political Correctness is a running wound upon our national psyche...

When my coup d'etat succeeds, I'm going to name a fattened calf Political Correctness and slaughter him for the celebratory feast.

Here's a little pearl of inanity from a recent memo by Joe Sandoval, division manager of purchasing and contract services for Los Angeles County:

The County of Los Angeles actively promotes and is committed to ensure a work environment that is free from any discriminatory influence be it actual or perceived. As such, it is the County's expectation that our manufacturers, suppliers, and contractors make a concentrated effort to ensure that any equipment, supplies, or services that are provided to County departments do not possess or portray an image that may be construed as offensive or defamatory in nature.

One such recent example included the manufacturer's labeling of equipment where the words ''Master/Slave'' appeared to identify the primary and secondary sources. Based on the cultural diversity and sensitivity of Los Angeles County, this is not an acceptable identification label.

We would request that each manufacturer, supplier, and contractor review, identify, and remove/change any identification or labeling of equipment or components thereof that could be interpreted as discriminatory or offensive in nature before such equipment is sold or otherwise provided to any County department. Thank you in advance for your cooperation and assistance.

All this because some employee saw videotape machine parts labeled "master" and "slave," and filed a discrimination lawsuit with the county's Office of Affirmative Action Compliance. He was offended by the terms.

As long as we're clearing the air, I should mention that I'm offended, too.

I’m offended that white is a color of mourning in Japan.

I’m offended that white people get more skin cancer.

I’m offended that William Prescott told his soldiers not to shoot until they saw the whites of their foes’ eyes.

I'm offended by "White Men Can’t Jump".

I'm offended that the titular antagonists of both "Jaws" and "Moby Dick" are white animals.

I’m offended that the world’s only white gorilla was euthanized a few days ago due to his advanced skin cancer (again, no melanin).

I’m offended that whiteboards are less common than blackboards.

I’m offended that white bread is considered nutritionally deficient.

I’m offended that Great White burned down that nightclub in Rhode Island.

I’m offended that Jack Johnson defeated Jim Jeffries, the “Great White Hope”.

I’m offended that light meat costs more than dark meat.

I’m offended that Jack Black is much more popular right now than Betty White.

I’m offended that the third place winner always gets the white ribbon.

I’m offended by Ghostface Killah.

I’m offended by the name of White-Out.

I’m offended by the Fightin’ Whities.

I’m offended that “in the black” is a term of financial success.

I’m offended by whiteheads.

I’m offended that white zinfandel is so stigmatized.

I’m offended that white chocolate isn’t actually made of chocolate—it’s just sugar, milk, and cocoa butter.

I’m offended that Bing Crosby could only dream of a white Christmas.

I’m offended that White Russian is not a more popular flavor of ice cream.

I’m offended, not only that the white line separating the lanes is broken, but that it can be crossed with impunity.

I’m offended that white flags are used to surrender.

I’m offended that a disproportionate number of white blood cells are drafted to fight and die in the red blood cells’ wars.

I'm offended that this tempest in a teapot about the "master"/"slave" computer parts isn't considered as ludicrous as the points I just raised.

Posted by patrick at November 27, 2003 03:13 AM

Comments

Posted by: Phil at November 27, 2003 02:40 PM

Posted by: James Dalby at December 19, 2003 11:19 PM

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